:: OTHERWISE ::

Of course i understand that formality is a natural habit with the Asians (or shall i say vice).
It dose not mean unfriendliness, but in the case of the formality expressed by a close friend
for me ( at a moment when he should have been forgetful of his usual restraint) it was delicate
problem to deal with.
To my own family, i struggle to free them by taking and interest in the house, by sharing the
work, by sewing, helping, by giving them some abundant thoughtfulness. i think i gave them so
much! I swallowed my pride; i was gentle and patient. But as soon as one battle was won, i was
faced with a new one. Visitors came. It was a renewal of the judgment to be passed on me, from
which my sensitiveness shrank. Too much praise of me was not wanted either and was received
without pleasure.
Some persons are really pathetic and helpless persons, with very limited feeling and no
understanding whatsoever. I made a tremendous effort to love them but find it uttery imposible.
Each one of us carries ans independent seed of greatness. Families give us life and nourishment
and a beginning. We can do the rest. And yet i like to have them great, understanding if possible.
What a lot i ask. ( i owed myself to the collisions)
I invent what i miss.